MILK BOTTLE GAY IDOL SHAME

Went out last night and got royally wrecked. Jon, Cam, David and myself whooped it up and it was just one of those nights where it's your mates all having a laugh, enjoying the music and feeling fabulous. I got a bit snoozy so headed home slightly early but woke up at the crack of dawn and couldn't get back to sleep. I hate when that happens, I was almost sick but managed to keep it down and not do my best impression of bulimia and stick my fingers down my throat like I'm prone to do just so that my stomach settles after a particularly heavy night.

Despite the merriment and drunkenness, I managed to pin Jon and David down to booking flights to Gran Canaria - they came round this morning for breakfast and we did it all - flights, accomodation, the full shebang. I can't wait for 9 days of drinking, chilling out, sun, Jackie Collins books, vodka, drag queens and more sun lotion than ever imaginable to protect my fair skin from the harsh rays of the Canarian sun. I've really got a cheek as I've had not only a holiday to New York and San Francisco but also a weekend in London and Manchester twice and now Gran Canaria - but you're a long time dead and at the end of the day - it's night.

I've done nothing else today except watch Falcon Crest and download some obscure show tunes that I can belt out really badly. I'm also now on a detox since my holiday has been booked - 6 weeks tonight I fly out and I'm determined to be a lot fitter and trimmer - I may even venture to the sunbeds to add some color to my pasty skin, I'm not going to be a milk bottle forever!

Alan had asked me to put up Angela Channing's final speech in Falcon Crest and I will get round to it as it's rather fabulous. Then there's John (not Jon) who loves Bette Davis almost as much as I do - I've tried to show him the value of Joan Crawford but he's Bette through and through - personally I think he's more Mae West but there's no swaying a gay man when it comes to their favourite movie diva. Not that many guys I know love the screen goddesses (I too love Jenna Jameson) Trash Addict loves Shelley Winters, Alan loves Jane Wyman. John (not Jon) and I love Bette Davis but most gay guys I know aren't the least bit interested in these legends which I find a bit odd myself although I screwed around with a guy a few months ago who was only just out of the closet. How he stayed in so long is beyond me as I'm sure the closet was desperate to get rid of him as he was a bit of an ear biter, not a nibbler, a biter. Anyway he saw no fascination in Dusty Springfield who until a year or two I didn't know was a carpet muncher, the type that would dive at five. He adored and I mean adored Barbra Streisand - Oy But these great stars of yesteryear have been overlooked by the majority of this new generation who put people like Jessica Simpson or Britney Spears et al on their gay idol pedestal - well they've not earned their stripes yet, Whitney and Mariah are getting there now but they've got a helluva long way before they reach the lofty heights of Joan, Bette, Judy, Lana, Ava, Rita, Shelley, Liz, Barbra, Diana, Mae, Grace and the other Joan - Joan C. They all managed to rack up a stack of marriages, breakdowns, career slumps, bad movies, public fights and awards over 40 years before they made it to the pantheon of gay idols and the new school have their work cut out. And if you don't know the second name of every diva I mentioned, their movies, their affairs and also their hubbies then shame shame shame on you!