FAGS, FURS, FLOWERS AND BAGUETTES

That basically sums up Paris. I've just spent a few days there and got back late last night with Debs, Julia and David. The flights were dirt cheap and the accomodation was ideal at the Pigalle area of Paris near Montmartre. Our hotel was along from the Moulin Rouge (a lot smaller in real life from the outside) and next door to the Follies Pigalle (a disco not a burlesque night) we were also surrounded by countless sex shops, peep shows, hookers, leather gear and neone lights as we were slap bang in the red light district so i felt right at home amongst the sleaze.

An ridiculously early start got us into Paris by 11 and we trawled the markets at Montmartre, it was very much like a set of a movie with sellers everywhere and quaint cafe's with people drinking wine and eating cheese, us included. We booked into Julia's favourite restaurant for dinner on Saturday night which is apparently a favourite of Miss Kylie Minogue and Kristin Scott Thomas so if it was good enough for them, it was good enough for us and then we headed up what seemed like a million steps to the Sacre Couer. Nice chapel and views of the city but nothing too exciting. Paris' underground metro system is fantastic and similar to London so we jumped on and off with alarming regularity but it was kinda fabulous to come up an escalator to be met by the Arc De Triomphe at the top of the Champs Elysees. Like New York, a lot of Paris seemed familiar, probably because I'd seen it so often in the news and in movies. What amazed me aswell was the amount of people wearing fur coats - most women had a cheeky seal or bear or sables engulfing them and they looked so cosy - David thinks that if I lived in Paris, I would be dripping in chinchilla and I had to agree, as Pete Burns said with regarding fur, I like animals but I like me more! Dinner on Saturday was one of the best I've ever had and truly delightful from start to finish with great chat and laughter with Julia, Debs and David - helped along with a few bottles of wine and some champagne. We had planned to go clubbing to the gay district but the wine knocked us out so we trawled round a few cafe's at Montmartre, sat outside and people watched and drank some more wine - and because we were in France, we bought a packet of cigs and had a few with our wine. Every bastard smokes in Paris whilst having wine, wearing fur and carrying baguettes all at the same time! I felt terribly E.I.T - Eurotrash In Training but I was half cut by then so was more trashed than anything else.

Sunday we ventured to the Eiffel Tower and went up that fucker which made me slightly ill - now I've been up the CN Tower in Toronto but the Eiffel Tower seemed to move a lot more even though I wasn't anywhere near as high up - the views of Paris were amazing but I guess after walking round it once it's a case of been there done that. I was interested to see Notre Dame Cathedral and the infamous gargoyles and Gothic design so we got a taxi there and it was a beautiful cathedral with those evil looking gargoyles popping out all over the place adding to it's legend. It was a tad depressing in there as Mass was going on and the organ player seemed to be having some sort of suicidal fit as the music sounded like the end of the world was nigh - well at least for him!

One part of Paris I enjoyed that was off the usual tourist trap was the Latin Quarter and part of the Marais district. It reminds me of a cross between Greenwich Village in New York, Soho in London and the street were Cafe Rene was in Allo Allo. Winding streets, countless patisserie's, boulangerie's, cafe's and antique shops made it truly unique and I adored it - if I was to go again, I'd stay there as it was just a little bit fabulous and now all the touristy things have been done I can appreciate Paris and all it has to offer. With cheap flights and decent accomodation and great company, Paris is a world apart from the UK and the British way of life. Despite reports to the contrary, the Parisian's we spoke to were utterly charming, the men were stunning which always helps although there were no gay bars or rendezvous on this vacation. What surprised me was how expensive it was for a vodka whereas wine and beer flowed like piss and the women still had killer furs. And that in a nutshell was a little slice of Paris, Cassie style!