80 - BOBBY'S DEATH - 'Dallas' was losing one of it's most popular stars - Patrick Duffy wanted out and the producers created a huge tear jerker and a classically fabulous Dallas moment. We had already seen the dramatic mowing down of Bobby by Katherine Wentworth outside Pam's house. He had thrown Pam onto the grass and tumbled over the car. So in the hospital room (suitably darkened for dramatic effect) The Ewing clan were assembled as Bobby breathed his last. Miss Ellie, Clayton, Donna, Ray, Jenna, JR and Pam surrounded him as he whispered for them to be good to each other blah blah blah. He flatlined, Miss Ellie twitched a bit, JR moved forward, Jenna broke down and Pam rolled her eyes to reveal rather fetching pink eyeshadow before she too started sobbing. As did I - helplessly bubbling! We all know that he didn't actually die and Dallas wiped out a year when they lured Patrick Duffy back for the rest of the run!
79 - TANYA & JASON'S WEDDING - 'Footballers Wives' Tanya and Jason were renewing their vows in front of their friends and Jason's team mates. Tanya however had other plans and threw the ring back at Jason, he punched her. Gasps ensued with both Jason and Tanya screaming bloody murder. Tanya managed to compose herself by inviting the shocked guests to have a party and enjoy themselves regardless.
78 - AMANDA HUMILIATES LEXI - Amanda had won Business Woman of the Year award although Lexi told a lot of the partygoers that Amanda slept with the judge to get the award. Amanda discovered this and delivered a very different acceptance speech :-
"The first line of my acceptance speech was to be 'Thank you Drew Mackenzie' But if I say that, you'll all think I slept with him. Which is- as we all know, the only way a woman can win this award. Anyway Drew, this is terrific. But you got it all wrong with that stuff about about integrity and conviction. You should be looking for women who'd backstab, cheat and lie as good as the next guy. Master manipulators, rumour mongers, gossips and I'm afraid I don't measure up in those areas. So I'm going to have to decline this award and make sure it goes to the woman who really deserves it. A woman so low thats she would resort to starting a rumour to destroy a person's reputation for not other reason than just for the fun of it. So come on everyone, let's put them together for Lexi Sterling. The lowest of the low and my personal choice for Business Woman Of The Year.
77 - BLACK CHERRIES - Carrie had met dashing Alexander Petrovsky and they managed to go on a date. Carrie left the date with Petrovsky wanting to go back to his. Carrie politely declined but they did kiss - Carrie was wearing a fab beaded dress and like so many men in 'Sex and the City' even wrinkly Alexander was sexy and Carrie did say that he tasted of Black Cherries!
76 - DALLAS OPENING CREDITS - OK, not actually a scene but it deserves to be here. We get to see various shots of Dallas passing over the screen. Skyscrapers, cattle, cowboys, the Dallas Cowboys stadium and then with the Dallas skyline in view it appears - "DALLAS - A LORIMAR PRODUCTION" Then in alphabetical order th cast all appeared in 3 different shots - That used to get me so hyped up every week for all the drama to ensue, helped along by a corker of a theme tune, geetar twangs and bass drums aplenty!
75 - JACK IS GAY - 'Will & Grace' had a fab scene when Jack told his mother he was gay. Karen had previouslt been shellshcoked "How can she not know? What is she? Headless?!" Judith was quite surprised at the revelation although Grace and Karen advised her that a gay son would help her stay away from chiffon and back lighting in her later years!
74 - BEV'S O.D - In 'Bad Girls' Costa Con, Phyl (Our fave Stephanie Beacham) was top dog in prison and organising all the drugs. Her best friend and cellmate Bev (Corrie's Amanda Barrie) was getting hooked on heroin and overdosed during the night. Phyl slapped her face and called her a "stupid, gluttonous bitch" before calling for help from Governor Frances Myers. She found the hole where the drugs had been kept but they were all gone. Frances then slapped Phyl and warned....
FRANCES - If I find anything, you're mine for a very long time....
PHYL - But my heart belongs to Daddy!
Classic Stephanie Beacham and showing what a fab bitch she is - even as a prisoner!
73 - ABBY & PAIGE - Donna Mills returned to the final episode of 'Knots Landing' as devious Abby and confronted her ex husband's new wife, Paige. She smiled sweetly and said that Paige managed a 7 on the Abby scale! Paige was horrified but I loved it cos nobody was better than a 10 on the Abby scale - and that was Donna Mills with her back teased hair and huge eyelashes!
72 - SPRAYED ANGELS - 'Charlie's Angels' were hunting for a girl and wound up in prison as Angels In Chains!! Not only that but they had to be sanitized by the big bad butch dykey prison warder who told the gals to open their towels. Hesitantly they did and just before the warder sprayed them she managed to sneak a glance at them - dirty bitch. It was fun because Kate Jackson, Farrah Fawcett and Jaclyn Smith were in it - in fact most scenes from season 1 of Charlie's Angels were fabulous - except when Kate Jackson wears a turtle neck.
71 - ALEXIS & SABLE WITH THE FISH BOWL - In one of the last 'Dynasty' episodes, Alexis got revenge on nemesis Sable. In this scene Alexis and Adam turn up at Sable's suite with a dinner cart and a fish bowl!
SABLE - You two again?! Good Lord Alexis, I don't know why you don't just carry him around in a pouch like a kangeroo!
ALEXIS - Pouch? You mean like the one you're developing! Hello Monica. I've brought a little gift for you.
SABLE - What is it now?
ALEXIS - Uncover it (she does) I just love surprises, don't you? Remember those tankers that you stole from me? Well they're sleeping (she drops toy ships into bowl) at the bottom of the ocean - with the fishes!
SABLE - What?!! (phone rings) Hello. Yes. This is she.... What?!!
MONICA - What is it mother?
SABLE - Seven?!!
ADAM - Something tells me that communications between here and Natumbe have just been restored.
ALEXIS - Monica you've arrived just in time to give your mother CPR!
SABLE - You are completely mad! This is the most outrageous..
ALEXIS - Darling, don't get too excited - it might be fatal
SABLE - This woman has just had 7 tankers blown up!
MONICA - What?
SABLE - You've lost your mind! How many innocent people died so you could waltz in here with a fishbowl?
ADAM - Nobody died
MONICA - Not even in the crew?
ADAM - The ships were at anchor, the crews were onshore
ALEXIS - Now that I've taken care of my ships I'm going to divert all my energies to finding out who killed Roger Grimes.
SABLE - Well Blake didn't do it
ALEXIS - I just love the way you stand by your men. What a pity they won't lie down with you
SABLE - Get out! Get out now!
MONICA - I think that's a good idea
ADAM - So good to see you Monica
ALEXIS - I think we've outstayed our welcome. Oh by the way, next time you need a manicure, just dip your fingers into the bowl. I couldn't get piranha but I got the next best thing! Ciao!
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
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2 comments:
Another fabulous post cassie, i still cry whenever i watch bobby dying!!
I didn't think anyone else ever got as excited as i did when the Dallas start credits were on - i always preferred the older ones you described (where there are three pictures of each character - two stills and one moving one in the middle)- they were changed in the late eighties to just one picture taking up the whole screen when Kimberly Foster Joined the cast. The music is as invigorating as it is fabulous.
Also i used to love ther theme tune to Dynasty and those opening credits. And the dialogue and melodrama is top-notch, especially re Alexis! Ciao
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