MARY KIANI AND TRADE

Now except Sheena Easton, Scotland struggles on the good ol gay icons and only Sheena springs to mind because of her 1999 "Fabulous" album and now Sheena's not actually Scottish - she got her American citizenship a few years ago. So all we've got really is Mary Kiani.

Mary Kiani is some kind of half Native American and half Scottish - her exotic looks have served her semi well. She sang as the vocalist on some early 90s dance tracks that I gre up singing and dancing to and was one of the first dance acts herself and marketed herself as "Queen of Clubs" which I guess she was. Mary was part of Glasgow nightlife for years and being a bit of a glamour puss - was always a favourite with the gays and therefore quite camp. Apparently in 1998 she headed to London and experienced Trade the legendary after hours nightclub and then brought Trade to Glasgow which is where my love hate affair with "Oor Mary" started!

I was a young gay boy trying different clubs and bars and I'd heard Trade was fierce so headed with some suitably mental friends and was swept up by the energy of it all and I danced my tits off for hours, the club was the Arches in Glasgow which is actually just some huge Arches underneath a railway station that hosts some crazy dance nights. So Mary brought the Trade name to Glasgow with it's house music ramping up throughout the night to a frantic pace. People dressed up, muscle Mary's got their tops off and Mad Mental Mary grabbed the microphone and probably smashed on all sorts of drugs proceeded to get the club going mental in good ways and bad for her voice.

I loved Trade and soon enticed large groups of friends to try the night and go wild, I'd be wearing sunglasses in a dark nightclub and Julia would have some tight corset on showing off her tits and we'd dance for hours. The music was unbelievable and the company brilliant. The DJ's cranked it up whatever the theme - for Mary's Xmas Trade, half the club were in full length ball gowns and she held a Millenium Babe contest which my mate Ralph won but we were all so smashed, I think we all wrote a tonne of votes for him! Every month was a different theme and it was the one night we would all head out and party our knickers off and rave about it, desperate for the next month to arrive. Mary loved walking around the crowd with her microphone (which was always a sign that she was ready to start her performance) She'd mingle and sing "Put your hands in the air" or just warble a bit and then sure enough she'd be in the dj box giving it her all and because the majority of the crowd were off their face, they didn't mind. My mate Deborah did and always groaned about it but we all shook our shammy anyway.

Mary then opened a dodgy nightclub called Slave where she actually did "Mary's Monday Night Madness" which was her singing for 3 hours apparently. The club didn't last long and Mary retreated to Australia to lick her wounds - However I saw her last year at Manchester Pride singing her tits off, still the Queen of Clubs - and I always thought of her in her ballgown or all in one black PVC catsuit she wore with panty line visible underneath - those were the days!!!